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Category: Personal Transformation

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Inner Work

“What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are so careful to clean the outside of the cup and the dish, but inside you are filthy—full of greed and self-indulgence! You blind Pharisee! First wash the inside of the cup and the dish, and then the outside will become clean, too.

~ Matthew 23:25-26 (NLT) ~

If you want to grow, you must do the inner work. Inner work is the washing of the inside of our cup. It is facing our dirt and finding the root cause of how it got there and why it keeps coming back. It is getting healing from trauma. It is confronting our shame and facing our fears. It is bringing our selfishness and greed and pride to the cross to be crucified with Christ. This is the most sacred type of work and the most neglected.

I think there are three reasons why inner work is so neglected by Christians. Firstly, it is unseen, especially in the early stages. As you first begin to tackle your inner demons, not many will come up to congratulate you or encourage you on the excellent work you are doing. There will be no acclaim or reward for taking up that broom and mop and getting down in the muck of your inner life. The motivation to do inner work must come entirely from within (ultimately from God)… the militant commitment to give up your fake-life to follow Christ. Your sight of eternal life (not in heaven but here and now) must be larger… more attractive… more valuable… than the Pharisee-life of religious superiority and praise of men.

Which brings me to the second reason that inner work is so neglected. It requires us to be honest about our mess and that type of honesty will not win you many friends in the church. The vast majority of the church is in the business of cleaning the outside of the cup – managing sin – modifying behaviour. Jesus says we have to clean the inside first. Transformation, Jesus’ way, cleans the heart first and then (after some time) the outside becomes clean. This type of transformation is lasting, genuine and Christ glorifying. The problem is that while we are doing the inner work, our mess is visible and that is uncomfortable to our ego. Often, to really sort out the inside of our cup we will have to seek professional help, confide in family and close friends and generally be OK with not being ‘blessed and highly favoured, praise God’. For many, that price is too high.

The final barrier to inner work is the lack of tangible results. We are driven to perform. ‘Only results matter’, says the management adage, and we have bought it wholesale. Inner work is slow, and tangible results are not evident for a long time. You have to be more committed to the process than the results. This was my greatest challenge to my inner work. I saw men and women of God walking in great purpose in their 20s and, “What was I doing in my 40s?” my inner critic said. Nothing much. Decades of just trying to know God better and confront my own depravity without much evidence of the greatness I felt called to. There is this pressure to achieve something… anything… to exit the process prematurely.

This performance culture is a delusion and a distraction. Why are we more inclined to listen to a pastor who has twenty books, leads a mega-church and has hundreds of thousands of followers on twitter than the little faithful old ladies in our church? I’m a big fan of little faithful old ladies. Without these pillars, there would be no successful pastors. Often, they are full of the wisdom of inner work gurus. Our eyes and ears need recalibration. Success defined by numbers of followers and size of empire is not a kingdom definition. I’m not saying that these things are bad, just not a good goal for your life. They are better achieved as a byproduct of more of Christ in us. There are men and women with big outward success that have cleaned the inside of their cups and some that have not. To the uncalibrated eye they may look the same, but the former are such treasures while God takes no pleasure in the latter.

I invite you to recalibrate. At this time many of us are on a break from work. Spend some quiet time with God. Re-focus on the inside of your cup. He is looking for those who will carry His Living Water, undefiled, to a world in drought.

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

If you haven’t yet, check out our FREE Spiritual Growth Foundation Course in which we cover the four foundational principles for spiritual growth and much more! In addition to on-demand videos which you can watch at your leisure, there are downloadable handouts for those who prefer written content.

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Make Room For Intimacy

I recently read this verse from the NLT translation of the bible and it resonated deep in my soul:

I want you to know me more than I want burnt offerings. (Hosea 6:6b emphasis mine)

God’s heart cry is to be known by us. Stop and let that verse sink in for a while. Seriously. Take a minute.

God wants intimacy more than service. Put another way, He wants sons and daughters, not slaves. Consider all the way back to the newborn creation when God walked and talked with man in the cool of the garden. God’s original intent, distinct from His intent toward all other created beings, was to walk in fellowship with man. Often, we are busy busy busy doing things for God instead of being with God. God does not just want our prayers, our fasting, our tithes, our church attendance, or our bible reading. He wants our fellowship. He wants us to seek a real heart-to-heart relationship with Him. Getting to know the Eternal One is the most necessary and serious endeavour of our Christian life.

The unfortunate reality is that our culture is more rational than relational. Consider the first 20 years of your life. What was the emphasis of all those years of preparation for adulthood? In our early years, we were taught how to talk, walk, read and write. Then we went on to more difficult things such as Algebra, Geography, football, playing the guitar, and driving a car. Then we graduated to real challenging subjects such as plumbing, performing surgery, or doing a theatrical performance. But how much did we learn about listening, processing our emotions, vulnerability, empathy, or handling conflict well? Not nearly as much.

This academic, task-oriented, performance-driven culture has fully saturated our religious lives as well. We measure our Christianity by things like bible knowledge, church attendance, ministry engagements, missionary work, and doctrinal understanding. How far have we drifted from “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:35). Or what about, “The most important commandment is this: ‘Listen, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord. And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” (Mark 12:29-31). The central issue of being like Christ is relational – loving God and others like Christ did. And all relationships begin with the desire to know and be known by the other.

I do not think we are even aware of how plutonic our relationship with our Heavenly Father has become. Consider how universally the bible has come to be considered the Word of God. It used to be (in biblical days) that the Word of God included a personal encounter with the Divine. There was no separation of God’s voice from His Presence. The Speaker was inseparable from His words. When the Word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, God personally spoke to him and said, “Fear not, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great.”. When Balaam announced what the Lord had spoken to him, he said, “This is the message of Balaam son of Beor, the message of the man whose eyes see clearly, the message of one who hears the words of God, who has knowledge from the Most High, who sees a vision from the Almighty, who bows down with eyes wide open”. Can you hear the echoes of someone who has been in the presence of the Voice of Many Waters?! In New Testament times the people gathered around Jesus to hear the living Word of God speak to them!

Nowadays, we casually read from the bible and believe it is synonymous with hearing God’s voice. This is a deception. Without a doubt, He can speak to us as we read, but hear me well, it is not the act of reading that brings connection with the divine. No no no. Many souls have read the good book (and some have memorized it as did the Pharisees) without any interaction with God whatsoever. I myself have come away from the book at times remaining empty of the Bread of Life. Hearing from God is a far more relational endeavour in the same way as reading someone’s biography is very different from spending time with them. Hearing from God requires a pure heart and an undistracted mind turned with burning desire and rapt attention toward the only One who has the words of eternal life. “Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words that give eternal life.” (John 6:68)

The Holy Spirit lives in us. The whispers of God echo in our hearts if we hearken to His quiet voice. I implore you. Take a step back from doctrinal debates and endless studies and make room in your hectic schedule of good deeds to seek God. Intimacy is nurtured in SLOW time. Awake before the dawn and set your affections toward God in hushed silence. Take long slow walks in nature and soak in the wonder and the beauty of His handiwork. Linger in heart-to-heart journaled conversations with your Eternal Lover. Instead of approaching the bible like a manual for life to be studied, approach it like a love letter that fills us with an inexorable desire to turn from the pages toward the Author of such amazing love. Instead of approaching times of prayer with a list of petitions, approach it with a curiosity to discover what Your Heavenly Father might want to speak to you today.

In this season of advent let us make room in the inn of our lives for the Saviour. Let us make room for intimacy.

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

If you haven’t yet, check out our FREE Spiritual Growth Foundation Course in which we cover the four foundational principles for spiritual growth and much more! In addition to on-demand videos which you can watch at your leisure, there are downloadable handouts for those who prefer written content.

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An Emotional Christian?

God has been speaking to my wife, Tricia, and me for months now about our emotional wholeness. The picture that I had in my head of a mature Christian is a stoic guy, resolutely following God and not being swayed or distracted by his emotions.  Moreover, he always has his ‘negative’ emotions under control. He never shows anger. He is never fearful, and he’s definitely never depressed. But I’ve been asking myself, “Is this picture an accurate one?”

To begin with, the bible captures God displaying a variety of emotions. Here’s a small sample:

Genesis 6:6 (ESV)

And the Lord regretted that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart.

Zephaniah 3:17 (ESV)

The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.

Matthew 14:14 (ESV)

When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick.

John 11:35 (ESV)

Jesus wept.

Hmmm God seems so… emotional. Doesn’t that reconfigure your framework for how we, human beings created in His image, are supposed to function? God created our emotions. In fact, on the sixth day, God looked at all that He had made (including mankind, fresh from the dirt, with emotions and all) and said that it was very good!

As I mentioned, Tricia and I seem to be in an emotional masterclass at the moment. My knowledge gap is huge, but I’ve been learning.  After attending emotional intelligence training and a LOT of reading, I thought I would share some of what we’ve learned.

First of all, emotions serve a purpose. Emotions are messages. We can choose to process the messages and act on the information, or we can choose to ignore them at our own peril. It’s analogous to sensory information that goes from our senses to our brain. If we push a pin into our skin, our brain gets a pain message that tells us that if we continue pushing that pin, we will be injured. If we are touched affectionately, our brain gets a pleasure message that tells us that this is good for us. Similarly, fear, for example, protects us from danger even before it gets close enough to harm us. If we ignored our fear emotion, we would soon be dead. The interesting thing is that emotions make no distinction between physical dangers/pleasures and things that threaten or benefit our soul. The pain of loneliness can be as strong as a physical pain. It is a warning that we are too isolated from others and damaging our soul. While the joy of seeing a friend encourages us to socialize and connect with others which increases the well-being of our soul.

Secondly, every emotion is an opportunity for self-discovery or connection (or both). The message contains information about what really matters to us. The messages tell us about our heart and processing those messages with God and those close to us creates intimacy because sharing our heart is one of the most relationship-building things we can do. Here’s an example: Tasha comes home after a really stressful day at work. She is looking forward to spending time with her husband, Rico. However, she gets home to a note that says that Rico has gone golfing. She is disappointed. When Rico does get home, he notices that Tasha is a bit cold and begins to get angry assuming that Tasha is angry because he went golfing. This is the moment of opportunity. Any married couple knows that this could easily lead to a bitter argument and disconnection if both Rico and Tasha ignore ‘the signals’ that their emotions are sending them. Let’s assume they get it right: Rico processes his anger and realizes that he is jumping to conclusions and asks Tasha if anything is wrong. Tasha processes her disappointment and tells Rico how much she needed his love and comfort and her disappointment on realizing that he was not home in such an impersonal way. Rico responds by moving closer to her and empathizing with her pain. He apologizes for not calling instead of leaving a note and suggests a movie in bed. The couple ends the night with their relationship significantly strengthened because Tasha allowed Rico to see how much he means to her and Rico reciprocated his value for her by being tender with her vulnerability and prioritizing her needs. (If only I was as emotionally intelligent as Rico!)

Emotions have gotten a bad rep in the modern Christian life. We are so concerned about not being controlled by our emotions that we have completely ignored a necessary aspect of what it means to be a healthy and Godly human. While it is true that emotions should not control us, we are not meant to be left-brained, rational machines. By sheer neglect of our souls, we have become half-hearted creatures trying to love God and people with our minds and a seriously malnourished heart. Not to mention we foolishly think we can love through an act of our will only.

Consider our fictitious couple again. Suppose Rico did everything the same except his face never reflected the pain that Tasha felt. His eyes were cold and his suggestion to watch a movie seemed to be made begrudgingly. He did and said all the right things, but his emotions were not in it. Do you think that would affect the outcome? You bet it would! Love is both will AND emotion. Our love of God and others cannot be decision and duty only. It must also be fully experienced and deeply felt. We have been trying to build relationships with God, marriages, families, and communities of love based on a rational approach that neglects the emotional attributes of our beings. It has not been working.

By neglecting my emotional signals, I have been neglecting my heart. I am dysfunctional (but not uncommon). I am not loving God with my whole heart, my whole mind, and my whole soul and neither am I loving others as God loves me. God pursues me with a jealous love! His love for me is ferocious! Mine is not nearly as hot. I have learned a pattern of behaviour that is not according to design. I have learned to suppress my ‘negative’ emotions and to avoid the vulnerability of intimacy. I have learned to neglect my heart. The process of unlearning is slow and difficult, but Tricia and I are committed to it because we were made to live wholeheartedly! To live passionately! We all are!

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

If you haven’t yet, check out our FREE Spiritual Growth Foundation Course in which we cover the four foundational principles for spiritual growth and much more! In addition to on-demand videos which you can watch at your leisure, there are downloadable handouts for those who prefer written content.

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ZOOM EVENT: Spiritual Formation 101

If you are longing for deeper intimacy, greater clarity and more fruitfulness in your walk with God then sign up for Spiritual Formation 101. We take a journey of discovery together for 8 weeks starting October 18th.

We will explore topics such as:

  • What is spiritual maturity?
  • The 3 phases of spiritual maturity.
  • Examining the Christ model of maturity.
  • Principles for spiritual growth.
  • Processes for spiritual growth.
  • Habits for spiritual growth.
  • Barriers and enablers for spiritual growth.

Sessions will be interactive, experiential and Spirit-led.

Click here to register: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1E4P3w2ba4sqomgaTUIuHomcFYt59zNvupYCVOw-H5as/edit?usp=sharing

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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How To Achieve Spiritual Growth Part 1

My parents brought me up without religion. Their thinking was that we would choose our own religion when my sister and I grew up. We didn’t go to church. We didn’t say any prayers. When I was 17, many of my Roman Catholic friends began attending Confirmation classes. So, following the crowd, I started attending Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults (RCIA) classes in order to convert to Catholicism. It was in these classes that Jesus first attracted me. The fire was ignited but my life did not change much. I carried on like many teenagers of my time. I was a diligent student and an avid party-goer. But my soul longed for more. I began searching for more.

My search eventually led me to a non-denominational Pentecostal-type church where I made a commitment to serve Jesus more fully. I became a born-again Christian at age 21. My life changed dramatically as I conformed to the values and performance culture of my new tribe. I read the bible from cover to cover. I stopped partying, stopped listening to secular music and initiated a demanding schedule of church activities. Things progressed as expected. I got married. We had a son. I progressed in my career. I taught Sunday School. I looked successful on the outside but on the inside, my soul was screaming, “Is this all there was to life?” And then there was the issue of a growing dichotomy between my external religiosity and my internal depravity. Then one day the water surged over the dam of my artificial life, and I pressed the eject button. I turned my back on church and religion and plowed headlong into hedonism.

Many years later, after the sweetness of sin had long turned sour, I cried out to God for help. He answered with a loving community of believers who loved me in my mess (and what a mess it was). I began the long road to recovery.  By this time, I had wreaked much havoc and there were many repairs and reparations to be made. But, slowly my life became better as Jesus changed me from the inside out.

A critical moment came one morning as I stood praying in my living room. Suddenly, I felt the tangible love of God surround me. I felt wave after wave of unbelievable mercy, life-giving forgiveness and unconditional love, wash over my body and cleanse my soul completely. I stood there weeping. I do not know how long it lasted but that morning changed my life forever. The transformation that took place and is still taking place since that day is real and exponential. As I encountered Jesus daily, I began to experience all the fruits of the Spirit like never before. Authentic joy is found in the face of Jesus Christ my friends!

The point of my story is to illustrate two foundational principles for spiritual growth:

  1. Only Jesus transforms. Not religion. Only a real face to face relationship with Jesus. Sure, anyone can change their behaviour and manage their sin but only Jesus can change our desires – change us from the inside out. John 15:4-6 (ESV) says:  “4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” It is the abiding connection with Jesus that transforms us.
  2. We change more through relationships than through information. We have been fooled into a left-brained approach to spiritual formation. We have been told that if we study our bibles and attend to our church sermons we will grow. These are helpful, but what really transforms us is loving relationships and strong bonds with people and with God. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 11:1 (ESV) “Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.”

Do you know how old I was when I had that encounter with Jesus? Thirty-nine! I spent a heck of a lot of time and energy trying to achieve spiritual growth through methods that just cannot deliver. In this series on spiritual growth, I’m going to share everything that I’ve learned over the years so you don’t have to go down any of the dead-ends that I did. Stay tuned!

Joyfully,

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

If you haven’t yet, check out our FREE Spiritual Growth Foundation Course in which we cover the four foundational principles for spiritual growth and much more! In addition to on-demand videos which you can watch at your leisure, there are downloadable handouts for those who prefer written content.

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Finally, It’s Here! Authentic Joy Online Courses!

Have you ever asked yourself any of these questions:

How do I achieve spiritual growth?

How do I measure spiritual growth?

How do I maintain spiritual growth?

How do I increase spiritual growth?

How do I become spiritually mature?

How do I know if I am spiritually mature?

How do I grow in spiritual maturity?

Well, we have been working feverishly behind the scenes to provide these answers to you in the most affordable and succinct way possible.

Over the past few months, we have spent some time clarifying our mission and improving our value-offering to you.

What’s our mission you ask?

To promote, accelerate and support your spiritual growth.

This is what gets us out of bed in the morning! Sooooo, I am super excited to launch a new Authentic Joy offering – online courses to support your spiritual growth!

We have two tiers of courses available at the moment:

I really hope these courses are a catalyst for your growth in Christ. I have put what I’ve learned from my life successes and my life failures into these online resources. I pray that it blesses you.

Joyfully,

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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ANNOUNCING Transformation + Coaching Institute

Announcing the launch of Transformation + Coaching Institute (pronounced Transformation Plus)!

My amazing wife, Tricia Celestin-Nicholls, is now a professional coach y’all! Tricia has been coaching people for eighteen years now, but I have watched her grow to a whole new level as she refined her craft over the last four years while pursuing certification.

While Tricia has a lot of experience and is well equipped with the tools and techniques of her profession, what I personally think is the best thing about what she offers is that she coaches in partnership with Jesus. The Holy Spirit is the ultimate Helper and that’s what coaching is all about – helping you on your journey of spiritual growth!

Behind the scenes, Authentic Joy has been undergoing an overhaul. God has been refining us and focusing us on bringing greater value to our online community. First, we added Bible Study Plans to our offering. Today, we are launching our coaching offering. Next, we will be rolling out a series of online courses. All of this is in line with our core purpose – to support the spiritual growth of our community. We are believing God for exponential growth in your life!

So, check out the Transformation + Coaching Institute or contact Tricia at celestintricia@gmail.com to book a FREE 30-minute exploratory session!

Stay tuned for more resources in the weeks to come!

Joyfully,

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls.
All rights reserved.

To receive more content like this in your inbox please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

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My Best Advice for 2021

OK here’s my best advice for 2021. Ready for it?

DO LESS

In 2020, COVID-19 reset the planet and for many of us it should have been a wake-up call to the reality of the hurried and exhausted lives we were living. I am currently listening to The Power of Vulnerability by Dr. Brene Brown and totally enjoying it. She manages to share powerful truths in a way that is both funny and thought-provoking. Highly recommended! She discusses 10 guideposts for wholehearted living and one of them is “cultivating play and rest and letting go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth”. I found this to be a powerful guide to a better quality of life. But what struck a deeper chord with me was how much more relevant this is in light of the COVID-19 pandemic. It was as if we simply refused to shut down, so the universe hit Ctrl-Alt-Delete and forced us to end all our tasks. Then the universe said, “Your move.”

Unfazed, we replied, “Pffft. We re-launch all our tasks aaaand we add the Zoom upgrade on top of that. So there!”

I believe the universe is now shaking its head and saying, “Puny humans.”

Suffice to say, I don’t think we’ve gotten the message. We are addicts. Addicted to busyness and distraction. Brene has already called us out on one of the ingredients that can keep us addicted to lives of busyness and distraction:

  • A lack of self-worth. We are constantly trying to produce enough to gain the approval of others and justify our existence to ourselves.

I would proffer a second:

  • Pain avoidance. Keeping busy is just another means of avoiding the internal demons that haunt our souls when things get quiet. We haven’t faced them, and we don’t want to. So, we keep busy.

The point is our exhausting pace of life is just a symptom of our brokenness or incompleteness. This is not an indictment. This is just the reality of being human. We all have brokenness that needs healing. We each have our unique brand of fractures and some of us are further along the path to healing than others but none of us are issue-free. We do have a choice though… a significant and powerful choice: will we continue as we are or press into the work of inner healing?

I believe that this is the gift of 2020 to humanity – a wake-up call to action. We got a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror and having seen the truth we are faced with a choice. The question is do we want to be more? Will we choose to be more? Enter, the second part of my advice:

BE MORE

I always remember a powerful perspective that I heard from Dr. Ruth Haley Barton that went something like this, “A powerful yes, enables you to say no.” She explained that in the work of doing less we need to be able to say no to things, even good things, and what gives us that power to say no is a strong yes to something else. Perhaps we are asked to attend a social event for work but it’s the same night as we promised to watch a movie with our daughter. Usually, we rationalize that we can always do the movie another time or we have to show up to get a chance at that promotion or maybe we tragically try to do both. But if we have a powerful yes to the kind of parent we want to be, or the kind of relationship we want to have with our children, then saying no to the social event is really saying YES to something bigger!

I want to leave you with some powerful things to say YES to and reasons to do less in 2021. I have found these to be useful in my life. Perhaps one or two will resonate with you:

  1. Doing less is an act of faith. Saying no to some activities or responsibilities is saying YES to a life of supernatural productivity. When the Israelites observed the Sabbath in the desert for 40 years, they had to believe that every Friday (or whatever day before Sabbath) God would supernaturally send more manna than usual and that it would keep for the next day unlike all the other days of the week when it would become full of maggots. Saying no to work was saying, “YES God I believe in Your provision!” Later on, they had to believe that God would take care of the survival of their businesses that would close for Sabbath while the competition remained open. The same can be said of us today. If we choose to do less (even observe a Sabbath, like I do) in obedience to God’s call to rest, then we enter into a beautifully supernatural faith-walk with God as He steps in to do more with less than we could do working ourselves ragged. I have seen this at work in my life and I know you will too if you try it.
  2. Doing less is an act of obedience to your call. The most important call on our lives is not what God has called us to do but who God has called us to be. If we have a big YES for living a life fully authentic to who God has called us to be then saying no to anything that is less than that, no matter how attractive, is easy. It is also a much more joyful way to live. Doing things that just aren’t who we are to please people or help a friend out or to get ahead socially or financially is draaaaining. We can fool ourselves into thinking it is a stepping stone to what we really want to do but it isn’t.
  3. Doing less is a commitment to a higher quality of work/worship. The work we do is an act of worship. It is glorifying God with the talents, personality and time He has given us. If we have a big YES to the quality of our worship through our work, then we will sacrifice quantity for quality. We all know what it feels like to be rushing from project to project and meeting to meeting always giving just enough of our attention and effort to move it along but never enough to be truly creative or extraordinary. Wouldn’t it be more God-honouring (not to mention personally fulfilling) to do our best work? To do work that is truly meaningful and transformative?
  4. Doing less is a commitment to a higher quality of relationships/life. All relationships require investing time to build connection and intimacy. Setting aside dedicated time to invest in the people closest to us and being present with them is a big YES to a more fulfilling life. They say the quality of our life is the sum of the quality of our relationships. We all know this is true. Just like we know that we cannot build meaningful relationships if we never have time to take our spouse to dinner, or play board games with the kids, or just listen to our direct reports without simultaneously checking emails or text-messaging. No to constant busyness is a big YES to better relationships.
  5. Doing less is a commitment to spiritual growth. I have read many books about seeking God and one of the things all the authors agree on is that busyness and distraction are the enemies of spiritual growth. Saying no to a life of constant busyness and distraction is saying a big YES to more of God and more of God in us. Some of the things that require us to be fully present and undistracted are: practicing gratitude, reviewing our day with God, two-way prayer (as opposed to rattling off a monologue without waiting for a response), meditating on scripture. Getting away from the noise of life and getting with God is a prerequisite for becoming present to the places in our lives that need His touch and direction and bringing them into His Presence for guidance, redemption and restoration. You may think that you have too much to do to spend time in ’wasted’ activity like prayer for more than 15 minutes but you will be surprised at the impact you will have on your world when you spend more time with God. Try it and see!

In summary:

MORE BEING, LESS DOING

Copyright 2021, Matik Nicholls.
All rights reserved.

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

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Welcome to Christmas at My House

One of the challenges of any marriage is the merging of two family cultures. New family norms and rituals must be formed that can be a wonderful ‘best of both worlds’ or an ‘acceptable compromise’. Some issues are easier than others. The degree of difficulty can range from easy peasy, like how to squeeze the tube of toothpaste (a real example btw!), to the not-so-easy, like coordinating parenting styles.

In my marriage, Christmas is one of those seasons that brings this culture clash issue to the fore big time. I come from a family where Christmas is just another holiday. If it wasn’t for the children, I probably wouldn’t even put up a tree. But for my wife, Tricia, Christmas is the high point of the year! Her mountainous village of Paramin is known for its Christmas parang music and food (There is even a song about it! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWooZugXL3Q). At Christmas time, neighbours go from house to house drinking, eating and serenading each other. Serious planning and thought go into this most holy time of the year and Tricia’s family starts playing Christmas music from August!

So, you see the problem. Last year my poor newly wed bride practically cried through Christmas Day as the culture shock of a bare bones Nicholls Christmas blanketed our quiet home. I tried to liven it up a bit this year but still it was a far far cry from the atmosphere of love, family and celebration that permeates a Paramin Christmas. I’m sure we will do it better next year. God is always working with us, even in the nitty gritty of my wife and I becoming one. This year Tricia wanted to get new curtains and bedsheets. We had no money, but I said, “Honey, any extra money I get is yours.” Well God must have been smiling as the words left my mouth because that very week my company announced a bonus payment that was very unexpected especially considering these times. My praying wife got her Christmas wish.

This annual dilemma got me thinking about the paradigms that shape how we live. For me, events are not what I focus on. I believe that family should be treasured throughout the year and Christ celebrated every day. Reserving a special day to have some euphoric moment occurs to me as forced and fake.  I prefer to focus on consistent habits. Tricia believes in that too but whereas I had an either/or mindset, she has an and/both mindset; consistent habits AND special days of celebration. She loves putting aside a special day for all of us to celebrate something special together and, for some, it may be the only time they think about Christ at all. It’s about doing things together, as a family, as a church, as a community.

Slowly but surely, she has been winning me over to her way of thinking and just like that a new and unique family culture is being birthed. My hope is that Christmas for us will be an overflow of the love we show for each other throughout the year and the way we celebrate Christ every day. And if Christmas Day doesn’t go exactly the way we planned then that’s ok. It’s not about having the perfect day; it’s about living a life that treasures Christ in the little acts of love and in the grand displays of shared celebration.

There is a phrase that has been resonating in my heart for this season and I know that God put it there. It’s the phrase, “Fullness of joy.” In God’s presence there isn’t just joy, there is fullness of joy! What’s more joyful than joy? Shared joy! Relational joy! Jesus’ mission was to share the joy that already existed between Father, Son and Holy Spirit with every one of us. In John 15 and 1 John 4, John said that he shared the things he wrote so that the joy of the writers and the readers may together be full or complete. Think about it… Have you ever had some really great experience by yourself and your only regret was that there was no one there to share it with? I have. Somehow that sunset would have been better with someone to whom to say, “Wow. Look at that.”  Joy shared is joy multiplied for everyone!

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls.
All rights reserved.

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Forsaking The Known, Embracing The Unknown

God is in many ways a mystery. The bible says it this way in Isaiah 55:8-9 (ESV):

8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

    neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.

9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth,

    so are my ways higher than your ways

    and my thoughts than your thoughts.

God is inscrutable. He is above human scrutiny. If we could understand God; if we could pin Him into a package that our minds could comprehensively define, then you can be sure that that would be a god of our own making. The clay cannot understand the ways of the Potter. The mind of Creator is, by definition, on an unfathomably superior plane to the created being.

I think we constantly need reminding of this. We too easily become arrogant and presume levels of enlightenment beyond our endowment. We become too sure of what God would and wouldn’t do; too convinced of our theology and doctrine; too secure in our denominational position. God does reveal Himself to us, of course, but be assured that what we know is far less than what we do not know.

The minute we become too sure of what we know is the minute that we lose our ability to receive the next revelation of God; to transition to the next season in God gracefully. You see, we never have it completely figured out. We read the historical accounts of the bible (with full knowledge of the end of the story) and feel that the way it all panned out would have been obvious to us had we been there, but consider this:

  1. John the Baptist actually witnessed the Father speaking from heaven and the Holy Spirit descending on Jesus as he baptized Him. Yet, when John found himself in prison and heard what exactly this Messiah was doing (or not doing) he asked, “Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?” What Jesus was doing did not fit into his prophetic interpretation of scripture. And this was the great prophet John! Jesus said of John that among those born of women there had arisen no one greater than John the Baptist!
  2. What about the disciples on the road to Emmaus? Jesus had been crucified and there were rumours of His resurrection. They bemoaned, “…we had hoped that he was the one to redeem Israel.” A dying Saviour and an Israel still under Roman occupation was nowhere in their frame of reference of the Saviour.

What’s my point? God often defies our expectations of Him. We cannot follow Him through our human reasoning or academic study of the scripture. Only the Spirit knows God’s next move.

1 Corinthians 2:8-11 (ESV)

8 None of the rulers of this age understood this, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory. 9 But, as it is written,

“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,

    nor the heart of man imagined,

what God has prepared for those who love him”—

10 these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit. For the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God. 11 For who knows a person’s thoughts except the spirit of that person, which is in him? So also no one comprehends the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God.

To this very day, the Western world is bound in an intellectual approach to God mainly through the study of scripture. Studying scripture is good and necessary but without actively engaging the Spirit it is inadequate.

Those who have embraced mystery, often called mystics, have frequently been vilified by the rest of us. A spiritual approach to seeking God has often been misbranded as New Age. This tragic misunderstanding has cut off many from an abiding relationship with Christ.

I was recently reminded of the amazing access to tangible relationship with God that opened to me when I first came across the concept of Contemplative Prayer. A very well-respected mother of the faith expressed her appreciation of my contemplative position and I realized how much it had now become a part of me. When I first discovered the contemplative, it was rare to hear about it in mainstream Christian media but recently I have been hearing preachers mentioning names like Thomas Merton, Richard Rohr, Brother Lawrence and Madame Guyon and I have rejoiced. Contemplative Prayer is better known by our Catholic brothers and sisters and I would dare say it is something that they have that we all need.

Listen to Madame Guyon in her book Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ:

“You see, the only way to be perfect is to walk in the presence of God. The only way you can live in His presence in uninterrupted fellowship is by means of prayer, but a very special kind of prayer. It is a prayer that leads you into the presence of God and keeps you there at all times; a prayer that can be experienced under any conditions, any place, and any time… May I hasten to say that the kind of prayer I am speaking of is not a prayer that comes from your mind. It is a prayer that begins in the heart.”

This type of prayer is a way of life that is not very common but, in my opinion, an absolute necessity. However, my overarching purpose is not a contemplative prayer sales pitch but rather to unearth the mindsets that cause some of us to throw out ‘different’ viewpoints like contemplative prayer without any serious consideration.

I personally have found that every time I get comfortable with accessing God in a particular way or to a certain religious routine, God shakes things up. The life of a disciple, I have learned, is a commitment to constant movement. My revelation of God and how He works in my life is constantly evolving and broadening. The minute we become so rigid, so right, that God can’t change our doctrine, is the moment of departure from His will. Imagine if Peter had dismissed his vision of God telling him to eat unclean food. (The thought is not so far-fetched… Anything contrary to the Law (Bible) must be from the enemy right?) What if Abraham had said that God would never ask him to kill his son? Would a good God ask such a thing? I think if we honestly place ourselves in these stories, we might find that we are not so sure that we would have accurately discerned God. These pioneers of the faith had to follow God into uncharted waters, down paths that even seemed unbiblical initially. But they had faith; they trusted beyond human reasoning.

Even the Christmas story is a reminder that God comes to us in unexpected and unanticipated ways. Mary had to believe that she could conceive the Messiah by the Holy Ghost, something that never happened before in history. The Jewish world had to grapple with their King coming as a helpless child from an inauspicious family. Emmanuel, God with us, rarely draws close exactly the way we imagine.

Walking with an inscrutable God necessarily entails embracing the unknown even if it offends our understanding of God up to that point. Our mental understanding cannot be allowed to be the arbitrator of our trust and obedience.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls.
All rights reserved.

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.