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Category: Personal Transformation

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DO NOT SETTLE!

Seven years ago, my life was dramatically changed when I discovered this truth:

“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

C.S. Lewis

(I didn’t read it from Lewis’s book, The Weight of Glory, but from John Piper in his message on Christian Hedonism. You can listen to it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-cRkUt4glaE)

I had spent more than twenty years trying to reconcile my innate desire to be happy with my desire to please God. The fact is that the world is FILLED with unhappy (or at best mildly happy) Christians trying to convince people that not drinking and not having sex and not partying and going to church and reading the bible and praying is the most enjoyable way to live. Pffft. Please. We are not convincing anyone. I know I wasn’t convincing myself… Until, one day, I experienced the Presence of God. In that very moment, I felt like I had taken the first desperate breath of air after years of being held under water. That life-giving gasp signaled that I would indeed live and not die. That I could be an unbelievably happy Christian.

To this day, the Presence of God is the ONLY thing that has eclipsed the copious worldly pleasures that I have tasted. The sad thing is that Christians who have experienced the fellowship of the Presence of God are rare. I don’t care how great the worship session was or how much the preacher blew your mind, without God’s tangible presence touching our lives we are still dead. D.E.A.D.

In Psalm 16:11b David says:

in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

This truth is worthy of a lifetime of pondering and pursuit. Consider these statements:

Fullness of joy – no joy lacking, perfect joy, complete fulfillment.

Pleasures forevermore – eternal bless, unending happiness, delights upon delights.

This is where every Christian should reside. When this type of joy exudes from our soul, then the world will know the glory and worth of our King! We should not settle for less. We cannot settle for less! There can be no waivers or qualifications! Nothing less than His Presence with us can be accepted as the normal Christian life. This was Moses’ prayer. We will not go without Your Presence! We have become altogether too content to go on without God. Go on with our worship sessions. Go on with our oratorical theatrical sermons. Go on with our well-choreographed shows utterly devoid of the Presence and power of God.

When the glory cloud fell on the temple that Solomon built, the priests could not even stand to minister! Has the Presence ever brought us to our knees? God has left the building. The church has become a dead academic institution of biblical doctrinal propagation. Tragic.

There is something called the existential reality of God. Few have experienced it. God can be felt, heard and seen. Saul saw a blinding light and heard a voice. That encounter so transformed his life that he left behind the Christian-killing Pharisee of Pharisees Saul and became the apostle Paul – commissioned by God. This existential reality of God has practically left the planet and the responsibility for that tragedy falls squarely on our shoulders.

My exhortation to us today is, “Do not settle!” Do not settle for dead religion. He has promised that if we seek Him with all our heart, we will find Him! Let us make an unbreakable oath with ourselves to become lifelong seekers! Whatever little caresses of the Spirit that I have felt, have left me hungry for more. Whatever little tastes of His love that I have sampled, have left me completely wrecked and longing for more of Him and Him alone. Whatever whispers of His voice that have broken through my consciousness, have left me yearning just to hear His voice.

Do not settle for church as normal! Do not settle for a mediocre Christian life! Do not settle for being a good Christian with a happy family and a pet charity. God is so much more! Seek Him until you find Him. We are meant to live in the unspeakable joy of the Presence of God! Anything else is a wasted existence. Any other life pursuit is a side-issue.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

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The Death of Ego Births Love

Two weeks ago, I took two of my sons to the beach. Having checked the swell height online, I felt the conditions might be right for them to tackle waves a bit bigger than they were used to. As soon as we arrived and I saw that beautiful sight of wave after wave breaking left and right over the reef, I was stoked. It had been a long time since I had seen such lovely peeling waves at this spot. I was immediately taken back to my younger years of days spent taking wave after wave until my arms felt like spaghetti and the sun went down. Those were good days.

I think it would be fair to say that while I was excited for the boys to experience the same thrills as I had experienced many times at this spot, I was probably more excited to finally surf some real waves. This was rare for me because our surf sessions were usually planned around the skill level of the boys.

As we paddled out, I took the lead, showing them the best route through the reef. However, they struggled to make it through the white water, and I had to go back for them and coach/assist them until we made it past the breakers. My elder boy quickly came to the conclusion that he was just going to watch us as there was no way that he was going to be taking any waves if it meant battling through those waves every time. There were about seven guys and one gal out, so I let us drift down a bit with the current that ran parallel to the shore until we were out of their way.

By this time, my youngest was looking at the waves reeling in apprehensively, but I kept encouraging him. I knew that he could do it. A smaller wave came, and I pushed him into it. He got it! My hopes for the day increased exponentially. But one hour, a few big sets, and a few wipe-outs later I was far less hopeful.  No matter how much encouragement I gave him, he was not ready mentally. He would paddle for the wave but back down every time. Eventually, I gave up and we went back inside.

He was dejected. He complained and whined as we paddled in and seemed to think that the turn of events was all my fault. I was aggravated and annoyed. The more he complained, the curter and angrier my retorts became. After we made it back to shore and after another hour or so of sulking, he finally asked, “So what are we going to do now?”

“You want to go back out and try again?” I asked.

“Ok,” he said.

As we started wading back out with our boards in hand, both of us upset, he said, “Daddy, you are not very encouraging.”

“What! All I have been doing whole day is encouraging you!” I said, flabbergasted and affronted.

“That’s not what I mean,” he continued. “You don’t encourage me when I’m down.”

As the words landed in my heart, I knew that this was the moment. This was the moment in every disagreement where you can choose love or ego. I could choose to hold on to my right to a different opinion. I could choose to hold on to my offence. I could choose to hold on to my position of parental power. And there have been many times that I have held onto those things. This time, however, I allowed the Spirit to lead and my ego to die. I did not feel particularly moved or compassionate at first. It was just a decision to really hear his point of view.

“OK, I understand what you mean now,” I said.

“So, what now? Are you going to be different?” he pressed further, giving me further opportunities to hold onto offence.

“Yes I am.” I said with a cathartic exhalation and simultaneous release of my view, my right to continue being angry.

And as I reached across to give him a hug that was when I felt the love and compassion flow from God, through me, to my son. Immediately the atmosphere shifted and even though he eventually concluded that the waves were just too big for him, it was not too big for us – our love made it through.

Letting go of ego is not easy. Perhaps, it is easiest with our children. But what about with our spouse? Or with our co-worker? Or with that person who has a different political persuasion?

Perhaps the fight that God is calling us to in this season is not that ‘righteous’ battle out there that we may be caught up with but the internal war to the death of self?

Luke 9:23-24 (ESV)

23 And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 24 For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.

 Perhaps we need less of being right and more of being love?

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

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Does God Care Whether You Like Trump?

As I watch the unfolding US elections from the safety of my home in Trinidad & Tobago it seems to me as if American Christians have gone mad. I’m trying really hard to make sense of it (insert emoji of my brain sweating).

So far, I think I’ve figured out that there is one group for whom Mr. Trump is an Elijah-styled hero taking on all that is evil in America. His abrasive personality and speech can be overlooked or even condoned because they believe that’s what is required to fight against the evil forces that is arrayed against him. They even have prophecies to back it up.

Then there seems to be another group who are more focused on the behavior and character of the man. For them, Trump represents an icon of misogyny, bigotry and divisiveness. Any positive policy decisions cannot compensate for the mere force of negativity that pours forth from his speeches and twitter feed on a daily basis.

What’s interesting is that both of these groups are Christian. So, who is right? And does God care which side of the fence we fall on? I would like to propose that God is less concerned about our opinion of Trump and far more concerned about how we navigate this highly divisive issue.

Like it or not, one thing that Martin Luther’s reformation introduced into the church was the propensity to part ways when we disagree on issues. The existence of so many different denominations within the global church and the commensurate features of separation and castigation will not be a feature of the people that reigns after the return of Jesus. There is a unification of the church that must take place as the body matures into the fullness and stature of Christ.

However, many have interpreted this unification to mean that all will come to common agreement on THE TRUTH. This may happen, but I am fully convinced that there first must be a unification of hearts before there can be a unification of minds. The skill that the 21st century church has to learn; the lesson that God is orchestrating world events to allow us the opportunity to learn; is this:  How to strongly disagree with each other while remaining in undiminished and loving covenant relationship.

The heart issue that God is putting His finger on, is how we treat the person that we disagree with on issues we feel very strongly about. Do we treat them with love and respect? Do we pursue deeper understanding and relationship? I believe 2020 has been deliberately designed by God as a year of reckoning. There has been no shortage of opportunities to part ways with our brothers and sisters:

  1. Global pandemic: From God or from the enemy?
  2. Wearing masks: Responsible act or sign of a lack of faith in God’s protection?
  3. Ban on church congregation: Responsible community partnership or infringement on religious freedoms?
  4. Black lives matter movement: An opportunity to show solidarity for victimized brothers or an evil spirit to be opposed?
  5. Trump: Friend or foe?

I believe that this is a critical moment. The stance we choose toward that ‘other’ person is now under God’s microscope more than ever before.

For me, God’s corporate demand echoes the personal demand on my heart in my marriage. There are issues on which my wife and I have different views. We both have strong opinions. We both believe we are ‘right’. So, what do we do? Parting ways is not an option. Forcing the other person to comply with our way is also not an option. So, what are the options?

  1. One of us could compromise. But if we both feel that we are doing what is right in God’s eyes then why should we go against our convictions?
  2. We could avoid the issues that we disagree on entirely. But how do we move forward in true partnership if we never discuss tough issues. How do we move forward in partnership without making any decisions on what’s important or how to tackle problems?

It seems like a puzzle that has no solution, but I believe there is one! The solution for my marriage and for the global church is the same:

  1. Choose to engage rather than to avoid.
  2. Seek to listen and understand the other point of view rather than only to propagate yours.
  3. Choose to discuss and collaborate without disrespecting, dishonouring and slandering.
  4. Seek to mend fences and include those with different views rather than separate and divide.
  5. Choose to live in the tension and unresolved-ness and patiently wait for God to work it out.
  6. Choose to trust God to work His will in and through the other person’s beliefs and methodologies even if they are wrong.
  7. Choose prayer and lovingkindness as your primary means of influencing situations rather than persuasion, lobbying or bullying. (Even when you have the power to get your way)

We, the church, are the ones charged with loving our enemies. We are the ones of whom Jesus said, “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:35) We are supposed to be the model; the leaders in humility, love and unity. We have been anything but… Our behavior on social media has been deplorable. We have led the way in bullying others to our beliefs.  2020 is our year to flip the script! It’s time to be the church!

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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Do I Love Working from Home?

Yes I do, but I didn’t always feel that way about some aspects of our new normal. My new perspective on work from home started with this statement:

“Daddy, you have to help me with a PowerPoint presentation for school.”

“OK, bring your laptop next to mine and you will follow what I do.”

As I sat showing my 12-year-old the magic of animation and the art of the layout, I felt oddly useful. Finally, a school project that is super relevant to the real world and that I’m really good at! I got to pass on my knowledge to the next generation.

Time travel back to over a thousand years ago, and the two of us could have been putting horseshoes on a horse or kneading dough for the family’s famous bread that supplied the whole village. Back then (in the 1800s, before the industrial revolution and urbanization), work was mainly done by hand at home. People lived where they worked. Turn… turn… turn… and here we are again living and working in the same location, albeit in a completely new way. Truly there is nothing new under the sun, as King Solomon would say.

I understood in a new way what had been lost with the industrial revolution and lost again with women heading into the workforce en masse in more recent times. I remembered reading about Corrie Ten Boom and her family of watchmakers, living atop their little shop. I remembered reading about the family rituals where work and leisure intermingled like a tapestry, and children grew up observing not just a tiny slice of their parents’ lives, but the gamut of dealing with customers, handling crises and honing their craft. The scope of learning was entirely more holistic and relevant to real life.

I came out of my reverie with a new perspective. I had been bemoaning the loss of separation between work and family life and the stress of sharing my work space with my children. BUT… what if there is a golden opportunity here that we have been completely missing? Consider this with me…

Every time our children crash our Zoom meeting is not a cause for embarrassment or anxiety, it is actually an opportunity for them to learn how work gets done in the real world. A world they will soon inherit.  The type of work and the tools may be different, but the core lessons are not much different to managing the family farm.

In a counter-intuitive way (given that this virtual world has been vilified as one that alienates), we have also removed some of the distance that separated us from our co-workers and customers. In that bygone era of village life, co-workers and sometimes customers became like family. Inviting someone into your shop was almost the same as inviting them into your home after all. Life was lived in closer proximity. There is an opportunity now to invite each other again into our virtual spaces… to welcome it instead of resisting it. There is the opportunity to discuss a piece of work with your colleague, for example, with the sound of your daughter’s piano lessons in the background. “Wow, she has improved so much since last time!” we would remark humorously, remembering the cacophony that jarred our last meeting. The world needs more proximity in my estimation. Separation allow us to co-exist without ever really knowing each other. I believe many of our societal schisms and racial tensions would evaporate in time if we simply got to know each other better.

There is power in perspective. There is a moving scene in the bible where Joseph confronts his brothers who sold him into slavery. Many, many years have passed. Joseph has experienced servitude and imprisonment but comes through it all through the divine hand and favor of God. As he stands reunited with his brothers, the highest official over the kingdom of Egypt after Pharoah, he reveals himself to them and they are understandably afraid. To reassure them he makes this monumental statement, “Do not fear, for am I in the place of God? As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.” Joseph had a different perspective.

We too today, need to bring to the world a different perspective. Paul said that for those who love God and are called according to His purpose, all things work together for good. This is the truth that Joseph demonstrated and understood as he looked back over his life. As we stand in the midst of this global pandemic, we should have a keen sense that, this too is working for God’s good purpose. Wrapped inside the pandemic package are gold nuggets that it is our privilege as sons of God to prophetically discern and mine.

It’s a great time to be alive! What shift in perspective can you make to help you engage more powerfully with the purpose of God at this time?

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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Christ Became Flesh So That All Flesh Could Become Christ!

John 1:1-4 (ESV) says of Christ:

1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. 4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men.

Jesus is the creative agent of the Trinity. He is the one who manifests things. He is the one who incarnates. As Jesus unfurled creation from himself it must have been a sight to behold! Then in a stroke of creative genius, He imbued mankind with two God-like qualities – authority and autonomy. We were delegated the responsibility of executing God’s rulership and we were given the freedom to exercise that authority as we saw fit. And then we did the unthinkable… We put ourselves out of congruence with the Word, disconnecting ourselves from the Life Source and thus disconnecting all of creation from the very source that upheld it. We introduced entropy – the continual and progressive decline of all creation into disorder. We introduced corruption. We introduced death.

So, what did Jesus do? He stepped into His disconnected creation to reconnect mankind with Himself. He incarnated Himself! John 1:14 (ESV):

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.

Jesus subjected Himself to the very futility, suffering and corruption that mankind introduced. Then, by His death, He took into Himself all those consequences of disconnection and cancelled its power. Death lost its sting. And then, with a final masterstroke, as He resurrected from the dead, He re-introduced His creative power into the earth by giving us the ability to reconnect to the Source of all Life! But more than that He has given us the responsibility for reconnecting the rest of creation back to this Source. Paul calls it the ministry of reconciliation.

But what does this ministry of reconciliation look like? In one place it is described as all the kingdoms of the world becoming the kingdoms of the Lord and of His Christ. In another place it is described as His glory covering the earth. In yet another description, His Spirit is poured out on all flesh.

In short, we have a mandate to reconnect everything to Jesus. Unfortunately, I do not think we have understood this mandate of reconciliation. Many of us have had an adversarial if not superior relationship with the disconnected world. Having been saved from that mess, we now look back on it with a sense of fear of re-infection. We protect our separation from the world at all costs, not realizing that ‘that mess’ needs us. In fact, that mess is our responsibility! Every place where there is corruption and disaster in this world is damning evidence that we have neglected or abandoned our assignment!

Romans 8: (ESV)

 19 For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20 For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21 that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now.

Can you see that we are agents of freedom?! Can you see that our ascension to the full authority and effectiveness as sons and daughters of God is what all creation is eagerly longing for?!! Our mission is not to hide ourselves away! Our mission is to be light; to be salt; to be the yeast of the kingdom. We have to be in the midst of the darkness and mess and bring light and redemption to every sphere of life. We cower in fear of being infected by the world, not realizing that we are the ones that are supposed to be doing the infecting!

There are some of us who understand and embrace our redemptive assignment, but our effectiveness has been dismal at best. Why? Because we have been taking Christianity and religious doctrine and feeding programmes to the world instead of Christ. We have been obsessed with educating the world instead of redeeming it or focused on alleviating suffering rather than transforming men. Consider this: Jesus did not open a school, hospital or not-for-profit organization (at least not in the traditional sense). Instead He supernaturally eliminated ignorance, sickness and hunger everywhere He went. Every teaching burned the hearts of men. Every healing was miraculous. Every food distribution demonstrated a divine source of provision. Where is the supernatural demonstrated power of Jesus in our lives?

Christ is the life source. Our #1 priority is bringing people, systems and creation itself into direct contact with Christ. This necessitates His tangible presence in our lives. He has the redemptive power. It flows from Him. Many of us talk about Christ, even preach about Christ, but our words are hollow, and our lives lack any shred of evidence that His power is at work in us. Contrary to popular opinion, our ministry is not proselytizing! Oh no! His power and love must flow through us with such voltage that everywhere we go and everything we touch is reconnected to the source!  

Our mission is to make His kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven. When Jesus interacted with people His life-giving authority was evident. He lived what He spoke. Everywhere He went, love flourished, sickness (corruption) ceased and lack turned to abundance. He is on the same mission today; except He has found it fitting that it takes place through us! Our mission should look like making Jesus evident. We must make Jesus manifest in us. Wherever we go disorder should be transformed to order, lack to abundance, death to life and darkness to light. We are His delegated agents of redemptive transformation!

To receive more content like this in your inbox and to receive a free e-copy of my book, “The Primacy of The Voice of God – Elevating the Word of God to Its Rightful Position”, please subscribe to www.authenticjoy.org.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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In Memory of Sonji

Last month my ex-wife, Sonji Delicia Nicholls (nee Daniel), passed away. It was the end of a five-year battle with cancer. Today’s blog is my small way of honouring her life but first a bit of back-story…

Sonji’s death and a couple other issues in my life have had me immobilized for a few weeks now. I struggled to write anything. I felt overwhelmed and when I get emotionally overwhelmed, I shut down. I retreated into my cave. In any case, what would I write about? I did not have any inspiration about anything, and I did not have the strength to tackle the landmine of sensitivities surrounding writing about one’s ex-wife (or any of the other issues for that matter). I mean, what would I say? How would our son, Isaac, feel about it? How would her family feel about it? How would my wife feel about it?

As I slowly emerged from my emotional coma, I felt a growing desire to write down my thoughts. It’s my therapy. But first I had to talk it over with my life partner. After a few decades of sharing the planet with the female gender, I’ve finally gained enough emotional intelligence to know that after being emotionally unavailable to my current wife for weeks it’s not a good idea for her to read a blog about my ex-wife without any prior discussion. 😊

Why is it so much easier to write about how I feel and post for the world to see than to look the person closest to me in the eye and talk about it? Because I care so much more about what she thinks than anyone else. That’s how vulnerability works. That’s one of the reasons why being a truly Godly husband is far more difficult and laudable than being a great Christian leader. But I digress…

Sonji and I have been divorced for over 15 years and over those years there is one thing that has united us – our mutual desire for the best for our son, Isaac. As to what constituted the best for him, on some things we agreed, and others were a source of continuous conflict. One of the latter was my desire for Isaac to come to live with me during his teenage years. Well, my desire has finally been fulfilled but it’s so bittersweet. For Isaac to lose his mother at eighteen is something no right-thinking father would wish for his son.

That brings me to Saul and David. They had their disagreements too (to put it mildly) and one could easily argue that Saul’s death made David’s life so much easier… but David did not see it that way and I understand how he felt so much better now. David mourned the loss of Saul. So much so that he wrote a song of lament over him. He only remembered the best of him…. And this is how I remember Sonji… And I don’t just mean that I choose to. I mean that, now, literally, all that fills my thoughts are the good things that she embodied. When someone is gone the disagreements seem so insignificant compared with who they were to you.

I remember the girl that loved God passionately. Sonji’s passion for Jesus diverted the path of my life from aimless existence to purposeful pursuit. I will be forever thankful for her for pointing me towards God in a deeper way. I remember the early days when we were just friends, I would travel with her from work and walk her from her house to a prayer meeting in the neighbourhood. All the while she would chatter on and on about the bible and what God was doing in her life. I never had to carry the conversation, but it was just nice to bathe in the light of her passion for God.

I remember Sonji’s grandmother. Sonji loved her dearly and I believe she got her love for God as an inheritance from her granny. She could barely see, her back was severely bent and her feet were worn by years of walking but despite her physical appearance her spirit was not downtrodden in any way. She was a pillar in Sonji’s life. I am positive that right now she and Sonji are enjoying a very joyful heavenly reunion!

Sonji was the consummate mother. She was the product of two generations of matriarchal homes and I only understood later how that shaped her in ways that were not even conscious on her part. She was a matriarch long before Isaac was born. I remember the motherly role she played in her little brother’s life. She would worry about him constantly and always took care of him. Yes, the mother instinct in Sonji was strong. I remember her forcing Isaac to eat as a toddler. He was always a big boy and I would point out to her that he was in no way malnourished and that he would surely eat when he was ready. She was not deterred. She was going to make sure her son was well fed.  Even when Isaac was a hard-back teenager, she would still call me when he was with me to check whether I had given him breakfast. It was a running joke between us. She couldn’t help it. Everything she did was with Isaac in mind.

I remember her strength. She was not loud and did not like confusion or conflict but do not think for a second that that meant that she lacked strength of conviction. She made her way quietly but indomitably. This was evident in her illness. She was upbeat and smiling throughout every second of her fight with cancer. She didn’t even look ill. If you did not know that she was fighting for her life you couldn’t tell.

I firmly believe that Sonji is now her best self. Complete, whole, beholding Jesus with clear sight and no doubt ringside in the cloud of witnesses cheering us on (especially Isaac of course). I will do my best Sonji, to walk with Isaac on the next leg of his journey. You certainly did your best in bringing him to adulthood. I honour you.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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Dissonance

My novel Authentic Joy is now available on Amazon for $0.99 USD on Kindle or $0.00 Kindle Unlimited. Click here to read it now.

Authentic Joy is about dissonance. Dissonance in music theory occurs when there is a clash between two notes or tones. As a Christian, for many years I experienced an internal dissonance. There was the person that I wanted to be and then there was the person I actually was on the inside where nobody could see. I believe many believers have experienced this internal incongruity at one time or another. In a sense, there will always be a gap between what we espouse as Christians and where we are on the journey toward that Christlike ideal. That is normal. What I am talking about is something deeper. It is a deep sense that our internal reality does not accord with who we believe we are supposed to be right now.

I grew up in Trinidad, the home of carnival and bacchanal (drunken revelry and licentiousness). This was the culture that shaped my youth. Added to that, I was naturally a free-spirited person. I was a pleasure-seeker. As far as I knew, the aim of life was to experience and enjoy everything that it had to offer to the fullest.

Then, at the age of twenty, I made the decision to give my life to Jesus and started attending church regularly. I’m sure you can see the impending clash. I changed my external lifestyle rather suddenly but inside I was experiencing increasing levels of torment. Nobody else in my church seemed to be having this issue so I kept up the appearance of ‘normalcy’ for a few years until one day I cracked, and all hell broke loose. I unceremoniously exited my fake Christian life, followed my hedonistic tendencies full throttle and wrecked my life spectacularly.

Authentic Joy, is an autobiographical novel that chronicles twenty years of my life from discord to internal harmony. (Spoiler alert) God found me amidst the wreckage of my life. He pulled me out. I made a few discoveries along the way. I discovered that external behaviour modification is a dead end. I discovered that all men are flawed. I discovered that nothing less than a real encounter with Jesus can change those internal parts of our personality that are as familiar as our skin. I discovered that there is no greater joy than the fellowship of Jesus Christ. I discovered authentic joy in Christ.

To read more about my story get Authentic Joy now on Amazon for $0.99 USD on Kindle or $0.00 Kindle Unlimited. I promise you won’t be able to put it down 🙂.

Joyfully,

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.
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Connection vs. Separation

The issue of connection versus separation continues to resonate with me so much that I decided to continue the topic this week. I have repeatedly had to be coached by the Spirit to build bridges that nurture relationship with friends, co-workers and neighbours rather than say things that destroy the relationship simply because I felt I had a just cause.

We will always have points of disagreement with others. That is just a fact of life. Even (especially?) in the church. Different denominations will have different doctrines. Different churches within the same denomination will have variations in interpretation or practice. Even members within the same congregation can have very distinct beliefs.

How does our Father and the Head of the Church, Jesus Christ, want us to address this reality? Especially when it comes to disagreement on issues of morality or our faith?

I believe the first thing that God wants is humility. We don’t get to decide who is worthy of our love or our relationship. God does. We also do not get to decide who is part of the Body of Christ and we are not the foremost authority on church doctrine. We have to be able to genuinely admit that we may ourselves believe some things that are not accurate. This should be easier for any Christian who has been walking with Christ for some time. Any Christian with a decade or more of growth under his belt I am sure can look back and say, “Boy did I have a wrong view of that particular issue or of life in general.”

The second step is a determination to choose love over fear. Most people choose separation rather than connection because we are afraid of one or both of two things:

  1. Contamination – the other person/church with the ‘bad’ belief system or lifestyle will cause us or our flock to go astray.
  2. Defamation – if other people see us with this ‘bad’ person or at that ‘bad’ church, they will think we believe or condone what they do.

Both paradigms are based on fear and fear is from the enemy. Perfect love casts out all fear. Jesus modelled God’s love when dealing with people with different beliefs or sinful lifestyles. He ate with sinners and talked with Samaritans. We have been given the ministry of reconciliation and peace-making not division.

I am confident that God wants us to connect with others in humility and love because that is what He did. God could have stayed in heaven, separate from our filth, but He didn’t. Instead he chose to become vulnerable, connecting with us in physical form, in our filth. He came and viewed the world from our viewpoint even though we were sinners and heretics.

As sons of God we must choose love. When I see the amount of content posted online by Christians dedicated to discrediting and pulling down other Christians it makes me smad (sad and mad at the same time 😉). It’s perfectly normal to disagree with others. It’s healthy to have dialogue directly with that person to exchange viewpoints. But to cut off relationship with that person is a step that should not be taken lightly (I don’t mean that you have to become friends or partners. Just relate.) And, it is a whole next level to defame/slander that person to others.

James 4:11-12

11 Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. 12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?

Let us please change this paradigm of separation. Let us mature in our ability to disagree with others while simultaneously remaining committed to relationship and love. You cannot influence anything that you are not connected to. Believers are described by Jesus as the salt of the world. Do you think that we can live this identity by staying separate, keeping our salt nice and clean in our holy saltshakers?

We also cannot influence anything if we are not willing to be ourselves influenced. We must embrace vulnerability because connecting with people who we disagree with means that we must be open to the possibility that we could actually learn something from them that makes us see a different view of life and adjusts our understanding of reality. I believe this is exactly what God intended. The complexity of God cannot be contained in just one person’s viewpoint. And therefore, we will never mature and come to the fullness of Christ unless we are equipped by that which each part of the body supplies. And this is what I believe is ultimately at stake – the maturity of the church. Let us choose to mature. Let us choose to connect.

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.