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The Sacrificial Way Of Life

It’s Easter! A wonderfully sacred time for most of the Christian world. A time to remember the sacrifice that changed everything and reset the world calendar. Most importantly, a time to renew our devotional life. As I read again the epic drama of the days leading up to Christ’s crucifixion, I felt my heart stir as the Holy Spirit breathed on me afresh through the scriptures.


I saw the frenzied crowds faced with a choice; set Jesus free or release the revolutionary – Barabbas. We know what they chose, “We want Barabbas!” My heart broke for their choice. They couldn’t see it. They couldn’t see their salvation in the form of a humble mystic. They wanted a revolutionary who would overthrow their Roman oppressors. My heart broke for us too. We still want Barabbas. Despite Jesus’ example of revolution through sacrificial love and humble service, we still want violence.


The Barabbian gospel is perhaps the most difficult anti-Christ principle to rid ourselves of… View our history – the Crusades, conquest and colonization of America and the 3rd world. As Jesus said to Pilate as he was being cross-examined, “My Kingdom is not an earthly kingdom. If it were, my followers would fight to keep me from being handed over to the Jewish leaders. But my Kingdom is not of this world.”


Hopefully, today we have seen the abomination and oxymoronic nature of using physical violence to expand God’s kingdom. Sadly however, we Christians are still leaning on earthly power in more ‘acceptable’ ways. Perhaps it is our religious ego overcompensating for our lack of real spiritual authority? Our Barabbian nature lingers on in subtler forms – protests, political movements that support ‘Christian’ laws or judges, vomiting hate toward those who we deem ‘sinners’ or ‘heretics’. It’s the same now as in Christ’s day – we want the political or social power to overthrow our modern ‘oppressors’. These Barabbian false prophets would have us believe that Christians and our way of life are under threat, and we must fight back! But Jesus offered another way – dying for those who want to kill you. Now that is revolutionary!


“We want Barabbas!” wasn’t the only cry that fateful day. There was another cry, this time from the leading priests and temple guards, “Crucify him! Crucify him!” Why? Because Jesus was undermining the religious system from which they drew their identity, significance and power. This was their real God – the thing they had to protect at all costs.


We’re still doing it today. Oh, when will we awaken to truly see Christ? Ironically, this even plays out in our very celebration of Easter. There are enclaves within the Christian world that refuse to celebrate Easter because they believe it is rooted in a pagan fertility ritual and furthermore, nobody knows what day it was on, etc. They crucify all who dare to uphold the practice. “If you were truly Christians,” they say, “you would not be involved in such an unscriptural practice!” Typical leading priest/temple guard rhetoric. What month or day Jesus was crucified, the roots of the word Easter, how it started many years ago… it is all inconsequential. The choice here and now, the opportunity, is to lift up Jesus together with believers across the world in sincerity of heart and unity of worship. If our hearts say no to that then we have to ask ourselves, “What is really important to us?” Are we more concerned with saying no to something that undermines our belief system (just like healing on the Sabbath in Christ’s day) or saying yes to the opportunity that Easter presents for unbelievers to hear the gospel and be healed? (Hint: Jesus chose to heal.)


I have been faced with my own inner crowd and leading priest lately. Jesus has been asking me if I am willing to live a sacrificial life. Am I willing to be crucified with Christ that I may be resurrected with Him? Am I willing to let the parts of me that I am still clinging to die? It is as though Jesus has set Himself in front of me, gently held my shoulders, looked me in the eyes, and said, “This is it, Mat. If you want to go any further, it requires sacrifice.”


I can’t say that I was all gung-ho about choosing the way of Jesus. I wanted to. Oh, how I desperately wanted to! But I didn’t feel I had the ability to follow through, not really, not truly, not authentically. I have seen myself choose my way over Jesus’ too often. So many times it felt like my heart would break in utter despair.


But… perhaps this is the mysterious power of Jesus’ sacrifice? Perhaps this is what makes the way of Jesus superior to religious power or political power? Jesus’ sacrifice actually has the power to transform my life really, truly, authentically. And so, I say boldly, “I CHOOSE YOUR WAY JESUS!” I choose to join you in your death and resurrection. Crucify me Jesus. That I may die, and You may live in me. This is the way.

Copyright 2023, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

The Death of Ego Births Love

Two weeks ago, I took two of my sons to the beach. Having checked the swell height online, I felt the conditions might be right for them to tackle waves a bit bigger than they were used to. As soon as we arrived and I saw that beautiful sight of wave after wave breaking left and right over the reef, I was stoked. It had been a long time since I had seen such lovely peeling waves at this spot. I was immediately taken back to my younger years of days spent taking wave after wave until my arms felt like spaghetti and the sun went down. Those were good days.

I think it would be fair to say that while I was excited for the boys to experience the same thrills as I had experienced many times at this spot, I was probably more excited to finally surf some real waves. This was rare for me because our surf sessions were usually planned around the skill level of the boys.

As we paddled out, I took the lead, showing them the best route through the reef. However, they struggled to make it through the white water, and I had to go back for them and coach/assist them until we made it past the breakers. My elder boy quickly came to the conclusion that he was just going to watch us as there was no way that he was going to be taking any waves if it meant battling through those waves every time. There were about seven guys and one gal out, so I let us drift down a bit with the current that ran parallel to the shore until we were out of their way.

By this time, my youngest was looking at the waves reeling in apprehensively, but I kept encouraging him. I knew that he could do it. A smaller wave came, and I pushed him into it. He got it! My hopes for the day increased exponentially. But one hour, a few big sets, and a few wipe-outs later I was far less hopeful.  No matter how much encouragement I gave him, he was not ready mentally. He would paddle for the wave but back down every time. Eventually, I gave up and we went back inside.

He was dejected. He complained and whined as we paddled in and seemed to think that the turn of events was all my fault. I was aggravated and annoyed. The more he complained, the curter and angrier my retorts became. After we made it back to shore and after another hour or so of sulking, he finally asked, “So what are we going to do now?”

“You want to go back out and try again?” I asked.

“Ok,” he said.

As we started wading back out with our boards in hand, both of us upset, he said, “Daddy, you are not very encouraging.”

“What! All I have been doing whole day is encouraging you!” I said, flabbergasted and affronted.

“That’s not what I mean,” he continued. “You don’t encourage me when I’m down.”

As the words landed in my heart, I knew that this was the moment. This was the moment in every disagreement where you can choose love or ego. I could choose to hold on to my right to a different opinion. I could choose to hold on to my offence. I could choose to hold on to my position of parental power. And there have been many times that I have held onto those things. This time, however, I allowed the Spirit to lead and my ego to die. I did not feel particularly moved or compassionate at first. It was just a decision to really hear his point of view.

“OK, I understand what you mean now,” I said.

“So, what now? Are you going to be different?” he pressed further, giving me further opportunities to hold onto offence.

“Yes I am.” I said with a cathartic exhalation and simultaneous release of my view, my right to continue being angry.

And as I reached across to give him a hug that was when I felt the love and compassion flow from God, through me, to my son. Immediately the atmosphere shifted and even though he eventually concluded that the waves were just too big for him, it was not too big for us – our love made it through.

Letting go of ego is not easy. Perhaps, it is easiest with our children. But what about with our spouse? Or with our co-worker? Or with that person who has a different political persuasion?

Perhaps the fight that God is calling us to in this season is not that ‘righteous’ battle out there that we may be caught up with but the internal war to the death of self?

Luke 9:23-24 (ESV)

23 And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 24 For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.

 Perhaps we need less of being right and more of being love?

Copyright 2020, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.

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