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Category: Christianity

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God, Speak To Me Through Anyone But Her!

Talking to my ex-wife is not one of my favourite things to do. Our conversations are usually about the children and invariably something is my fault and I feel like I’m being berated (although she says that’s her normal voice). The calls normally go much longer than I enjoy talking on the phone (which is already painful for me). Having said that, her concern for her children is genuine and sometimes what she says has truth to it.

For me, listening for what God is saying through my ex-wife is a mortification of my flesh. It almost literally hurts. However, I am convinced that these innocuous everyday human interactions are some of the most powerful spiritual work that we do! It is in these trenches that we build patience, humility, long-suffering; the outworking of a love for others that transcends how we are being treated and our selfish self-interests.

I still have a lot of flesh to crucify…. I do not always handle it well. I sometimes forget to take a breath and ask for the Helper to hold me in that moment when the flesh begins to sizzle on the altar. Often, I jump out of the flames of purification. It’s painful man!

I am convinced that we underestimate just how necessary this work, this crucifixion of our flesh, is to our intimacy with Christ. It is nothing less than spiritual worship. If we want more of Christ in us, the flesh has to die.

This is why I am of the view that:

  1. People who isolate themselves or their hearts from deep relationships will not grow past a certain point in their relationship with Christ. You cannot say you love a God you have not seen and you do not love the brother you have seen.
  2. Loving the people close to you in a very specific way is more important and more difficult than loving those afar off in a more general way. It is much easier to appear nice to your church or your office than to deeply love your spouse and children.

Loving those right in front of you is deeply spiritual work. It is a spiritual imperative to remain open and vulnerable, risking hurt, victimization and betrayal for the cause of Christ, our hope of glory, being made manifest to and in those around us.

God, in His wisdom, has ordained His glorious light to dwell in fallible human beings; the church. If we want to love like Him, if we want to become mature enough to hold His fullness, we must be able to reverence the Christ in the imperfect person.

I believe we have sorely neglected this spiritual discipline. There has been a great percentage of the sermons that I have listened to that is nothing more than the pastor complaining about wrongs done to him. And many leaders have isolated themselves as a reaction to this type of betrayal. There are also many church members who press the eject button, leaving their church, when they suffer betrayal and hurt. Any real long-term relationship will at some point lead to offense and hurt. It is at that point the work truly begins… Love or leave? Forgive or forget it? Pursue love or protect self?

We rob ourselves of our own growth in Christlikeness when we refuse to do the work of mortification of self in the context of our relationships. There is no resurrection without crucifixion!

Copyright 2019, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.
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Let The Women Speak!

There have been many topics rumbling around my heart this past week but ultimately this one bubbled to the surface as my heart‘s cry for my sisters in the faith could not remain unexpressed.

As the story about a prominent conservative pastor’s dismissive, dishonouring and unloving comments about two female preachers in particular and women in ministry in general made its way around the Christian news circuit I watched with mixed emotions. First, I was angry that this pastor and those of his ilk still find ears willing to entertain such unChristlike messages and attitudes. Even if his view was right (and I will get to that) the manner in which it was delivered negated everything he said. It was not delivered in love to say the least.

Then I was grieved. Grieved that we are still here in this place in the church. That women are still treated this way. It must hurt the heart of God. But then as the support started coming through from the Body of Christ condemning this message of hate and encouraging the women who had been named, I was filled with hope and joy.

The times are changing. The female voice in the Church is being recognized and honoured. I firmly believe that this is one of the signs that the church, the Bride of Christ, is maturing. There is no return of Christ until the Church appreciates, honours and is equipped by the female voice.

I first began to appreciate this on a very personal level years ago when I started doing bible plans on YouVersion. I was yearning for deeper intimacy with God and I quickly realized that the plans that really took me deeper were all written by women. Most plans tended to be very heady and academic, but the real gems were relational and encouraged an actual encounter with the Truth not just an appreciation of the truth. (Check out www.thistlebend.org!) There were some exceptions, but the trend was unmistakeable, women were better at teaching from a place of intimacy and encounter.

This explained a lot of why the church today is so much head and so little heart; so much truth and so little grace. The need to recognize and empower women is not just for their sake, it is more for ours! It also explains the nature of the enemy’s stronghold against female ministers; it’s all a rational, academic, biblical argument centred on some statements from Paul. The problem is, if we don’t have the heart of God, we cannot interpret the text accurately. We cannot discern what in the bible is the will of God, what is the culture of the day and what is the personality of men. There are so many passages in the bible that show women in prominent positions of ministry that it is strange that we hold onto a couple of verses from Paul.

What blinds us is our own hearts of course; our own lack of love. We see only what our hearts allow us to see. To illustrate: The bible has no support for the abolition of slavery. None. Slavery is accepted throughout. In fact, it admonishes slaves to obey their masters in sincerity of heart and not just to give eye-service! Yet the Church today is crystal clear on what the heart of God is. There is no doubt that slavery is not of God. But it was not always so. The upheavals that are happening today in Catholic and Protestant circles concerning women in leadership are akin to the battles that took place as men and women fought for the abolition of slavery years ago. Our current crisis is a sign that our hearts are awakening to God’s complete love for and calling upon women teachers, evangelists, pastors, prophets and apostles. It is a good sign!

One day the issue of the biblical view of women in ministry will no longer be a topic of debate. In that day the Church will shine with another degree of glorious brightness as we march on towards the fullness of the stature of Christ!

Copyright 2019, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.
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A Culture Of Relationship

Well folks, we have come to the end; the final instalment in my kingdom culture series! I hope you have enjoyed the content thus far. My aim in this series has been to highlight some of the values of authentic kingdom culture and to juxtapose that against the prevailing culture in the world. My hope is that the series has provoked thought and inspired you to live the values of the kingdom wherever you are!

In 1976 Edward T. Hall proposed a model for viewing culture as an iceberg. The part of an iceberg that is visible above the water is only 10% of its mass. The remaining 90% lurks hidden below the surface. Hall proposed that culture is the same; what we can see; the food, festivals, flag and fashion, is only 10% of what constitutes the culture. Underpinning that are dispositions, values, attitudes and beliefs. Let’s transpose this to the local church. The worship songs, preaching, activities, etc. are the most visible expressions of the culture but what I have been trying to focus on in this series is the underlying beliefs that lie below.

For this final piece I have chosen an issue which I believe is at the very bottom of the iceberg – love. I believe that love expressed through relationship is the very foundation of kingdom culture. I do not believe that anything achieved or constructed in the kingdom is of any value or merit or integrity unless it comes from a motive of love that finds expression through relationship.

Jesus said that all the Law and the Prophets depend on two commandments:

  1. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.
  2. You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

Love for God and love for others are the foundational values of the kingdom.

Paul said that the most powerful exhibit of spiritual gifts or the most pious expressions of religious duty are all nothing if they are not done with love. Wow!

What does this mean for us? Well one practical implication is that God is not impressed by and He doesn’t respond to, mere spiritual activity. Often, I hear people say that the church would be better if we pray like we used to, or we attend services like we used to. I understand where those sentiments come from but the answer is not in the activity. The answer lies first in the quality of our relationship with God and with others. The activities are the 10% overflow from the 90% foundation.

I have found this to be a radically life-changing understanding. It means that our lack of victory in a situation may be more linked to the heart attitude we have toward our spouse than the time we put in in prayer.

This was recently brought home to be in a very tangible way. I was struggling with mild depression. I felt overwhelmed by the challenges in my marriage and the melding of two families under one roof. Extended family members weren’t making it any easier either. But worst of all my prayer life was nonexistent and my bible study was dull. Then God showed me that I had been carrying around a little undercurrent of resentment toward my wife. I thought it was nothing. I thought I had good reasons why I should feel that way but God saw it and He did not share my view. I was stopping the free flow of His love. The moment I saw it and acknowledged it for what it was, my life changed.

The same principle applies to other spheres of our lives. If we want more of the Presence of God in our ministry, don’t necessarily focus on what activity we need to add or change, focus on who we need to forgive or who we need to ask forgiveness of, or maybe which other ministries, leaders or denominations we pull down!

Kingdom power and the Presence of God flows and endures where people know His heart and live His values.

My dear friends, devote your lives to loving God completely and loving others well. Nothing else is of greater eternal consequence!

Copyright 2019, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.
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GUEST POST: IF YOU HAVE A PULSE, YOU HAVE A PURPOSE!

Hello my friends!

I recently did a guest post on the Godly Chic Diaries. June (the author of Godly Chic Diaries) produces wonderfully uplifting content. She has been awarded and featured for the Top 30 Positivity Blog 2019 and top 100 Christian Women Blog 2019. So head on over and check out her blog!

Here’s my feature on her site:

via GUEST POST: IF YOU HAVE A PULSE, YOU HAVE A PURPOSE!

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A Culture of Success

Welcome to Kingdom Culture #5! Let’s talk about success. Everybody wants to be successful… including Christians. Everybody wants to accomplish something. We want to have a good job and be able to afford nice things. Or maybe we are a little more spiritual and we want to win souls for Christ and become a preacher, evangelist or apostle. Church leaders want to have a growing congregation and a big building. We all have a goal; a vision in our head of what success will look like.

The question is: Is it God’s vision? Does God have the same vision of success that we do? Let’s be honest, is our vision that much different from everybody else’s. Does the man who doesn’t serve Christ not also dream of riches and titles and big organizations? Is what drives us not the same as what drives them?

I have at least five friends who have special needs children and through them I’ve learned a lot about this accomplishment culture that is in our veins. I see the pain that parents go through when their child cannot do what other children can do. I see the fears of how society will treat their children. Will they have a successful life?

This hit me one day so hard and I had to take a step back and ask God to see things through His eyes. Does God measure the success of a human life by their accomplishments? If my child cannot read or write or even talk by a certain age does God see failure? NO! God sees more! Jesus sees the human being that He died for; that He accomplished all for, so that that precious child could call Him friend.

The value of a life is not in accomplishments. The value of a life is how much God paid to redeem that life. The value is the life of His Son. There is no other qualifier. We don’t have to achieve to be valued. We walk in great purpose and destiny because we are already valued!

Let us examine ourselves. If in our hearts we worship success, if pictures like the one above turn us on, then let us ask God to adjust our hearts and tune it to His value-system. There is a popular way of thinking that says that we must project success to attract those who don’t know God. It actually does the exact opposite. There is even a pastor in my country that puts up a billboard on the highway with a picture of his children and their academic qualifications every time one of them does well! I am sure he is well-intentioned but I am not so sure that that is the message that God wants to send. Was Jesus successful according to world standards? The truth is, He lived a humble life and died a most undignified death. He lived his life not for Himself but to please His Father.

Any culture that idolizes success and glorifies anything but the King of Glory is not the culture of the Kingdom. It is some other culture. Our Father runs out to meet the failure like the prodigal son and holds a homecoming celebration in heaven! Our King delights in using the frail, weak, foolish things of this earth to confound the wise!

We aren’t trying to draw attention to our great accomplishments mistakenly thinking that this will attract others to our God. Rather, like Paul, we should boast in our weaknesses so that the power of God may shine through us. We ought to humbly and sacrificially expend our lives to glorify Christ and Christ alone!

Copyright 2019, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.
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The Primacy of The Voice of God

It’s my birthday! God has blessed me with so many wonderful people in my life and taken me through so many challenges that I just feel so grateful on days like today. 

I’m extra excited today because today I get to give the gift! 

I’m launching my new book – The Primacy of The Voice of God: Elevating The Word of God to Its Rightful Position – and i’m giving it away free! 

Here’s an excerpt:

Hebrew 4:12-13 (ESV) refers to the Word like this:

12 For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account.

Hebrews defines the Word of God as:

  1. Living
  2. Powerful
  3. Sharp
  4. Discerning

And if the reader had any doubt as to what, or rather who, the author is referring, in verse 13 the Word of God is referred to with the personal pronouns ‘his’ and ‘him’. The clear conclusion of this passage, therefore, is that the Word of God is a living, active person.

However, I admit that this is just the tip of the iceberg. There are many questions still to be answered. I have just laid the foundation – Jesus Christ; the Word of God. It may seem a simplistic truth, but Jesus is the foundation on which everything else is built. He is The Rock on which everything else stands. He is the chief cornerstone which you must be broken upon or He will break you to pieces (Mat 21:42-44).

The primary question I will seek to answer is this: ‘Are we correct to equate the Word of God with the Bible?’ In the following chapters we will seek the answer to this question and hopefully in so doing answer many others. We will look to see what the Bible says about the Word of God and about itself in the Old and New Testaments. We will discover what it means for the Word of God to be living and active in the Christian life. I hope you will find this journey of discovery both challenging and rewarding.

The infinite-ness of God has always captivated me. He is so vast; His ways so far above and beyond my capacity to imagine or comprehend. Fathoming God is like trying to imagine a colour that I have never seen before. No matter how much I try, my mind cannot break free from its tether to the world of what has already been created. I cannot create (even in thought) anything that is higher than my level of existence. For this reason, a theology that creates a God that can be easily boxed-in or comprehended by my fickle human mind has always greatly disturbed me. If God created me, then He cannot exist on my level.

I hope this book seriously challenges your God-shaped-box and I hope that in doing so a chain reaction is set off in your life that magnifies and glorifies God with the exponential expansion and blinding brilliance of a supernova! If God is god then He is utterly beyond our capacity to fully comprehend Him!

To download the free Ebook or purchase the kindle version on Amazon for just $0.99 US go here http://authenticjoy.org/books. The paperback version is also available on Amazon.

I do have a small birthday request:

  • I know this book is not for everyone and that’s ok. But even if it’s not of interest to you could you please share this post so that it can reach others who might be interested?
  • If you do read it, I would really love to get your feedback. Please send me a message and/or leave a review on Amazon with your honest feedback.

Thank you my joyful friends.

Copyright 2019, Matik Nichoiils. All rights reserved.
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A Culture Of Building Empires

Welcome to part 4 of my series on kingdom culture. Today I want to continue to address leadership through the analogy of shepherding. Jesus is the Good Shepherd. Let’s listen to Him talking about His craft (Luke 15:1-7):

1 Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him. 2 And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, “This man receives sinners and eats with them.”

3 So he told them this parable: 4 “What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it? 5 And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. 6 And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, ‘Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost.’ 7 Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.

What intrigues me about this parable is that the shepherd seems to risk the entire flock to go get one sheep! It makes no sense to my logical mind! But that’s Jesus. And that’s the culture of the kingdom.

The question is, “What is the culture in our churches?” I submit to you that church leaders today operate by the mandate to secure the flock at all costs. Resources are expended to keep the congregation fat and comfortable and stray sheep are viewed as toxic and expendable. The ethos is not to risk anything to win the lost but to secure and expand the pastor’s church empire.

The value of the world system is to protect:

  • The income of the church/leader.
  • The reputation of the church/leader.
  • The success of the church/leader.

More like a business than the church of Jesus Christ, right? But that is exactly how many churches operate today. Overtly or tacitly it’s all about the numbers; the revenue; the size of the congregation; the number of churches in the network; the popularity on twitter. In other words, the modern church and their leaders are focused on the 99; the big number. Whereas, Jesus is focused on the one; the individual. Kingdom culture invests in building up people. World culture invests in building up empires.

Back to the parable… These sinners that Jesus associated with were Israelites ; Jesus’ ministry was to the lost sheep of Israel. It was the Jewish people who were living immoral lives. The parallel to the Jewish sinners of Jesus’ time would be the backslider in our local church context. For example, the couple living in fornication or the young lady who comes to church after partying every Saturday night or maybe the smoking cussbud or maybe the struggling homosexual. How do we treat these people? Are we willing to meet them where they are? I know a pastor who said you had to discipline and expose sin otherwise a demon would break loose in your church and ‘infect’ others. In other words, protect the flock. I have also witnessed backsliders trying to make a step back to church and back to God, and their leaders put barriers in their way. The leader made them apologize to him and to the church or they had to get permission from the leader to attend a service or to partake in communion.

Kingdom culture is radically different! Take the parable of the prodigal son which is also in Luke 15 (Not by coincidence. Jesus is making a point.). The prodigal son takes all his share of the Father’s resources and goes and wastes it. When he comes to his senses and comes back the Father seeing him afar off runs out to meet him and celebrates his return! The Father doesn’t shame him, doesn’t ask him to apologize and He isn’t worried about the prodigal son infecting his ‘good’ boy. In fact, He takes resources from the faithful son’s share to celebrate his wayward son’s return! How counter-world-cultural is that!

Kingdom culture is intensely personal. Kingdom people take a personal and genuine interest in each individual, especially those weakest and furthest from God. Kingdom people are motivated by love, not by increasing church numbers or pleasing the crowd or keeping a righteous image.

When we are more concerned with protecting the reputation of our church than reaching the sinners in our church, we are operating in world culture. When we are so concerned about our personal reputation that we won’t go somewhere questionable to find a fallen brother then we are operating in world culture. When we are more concerned with keeping the high status or big-tithing members happy than reaching the furthest from God then we are way off course.

James 5:19-20

19 My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, 20 let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.

Kingdom culture is shaped by the values of the King who left the glory of heaven behind to come to a fallen, sinful earth to redeem His lost sheep!

Copyright Matik Nicholls, 2019. All rights reserved.
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When Your Children Ask Hard Questions

Me and my little man.

Over the last 3 weeks I’ve been doing a series on kingdom culture which I hope you have been enjoying but today I’m taking a break to share something a little different. Actually, a lot different. Recently, I was going over the website for my blog, making a few updates, and I realized that I’d drifted a bit from my initial mission.

When I started this blog, it was my goal not only to share some of my thoughts but also some of my life. So, today I want to share an interaction I had with my son.

My new wife had popped into the grocery while I waited for her in the truck with my daughter and youngest son. And out of the blue he looks at me and asks, “So dad how long do you think this marriage will last?” I could hear my daughter snickering at the question. It was one of those hard questions that usually only children will ask so unabashedly.

As a side note, I encourage my children to ask me anything. I love the fact that they think about stuff and that they feel free to ask me whatever is on their mind. I never scold them and I never sidestep the answers.

So, in that vein, I said, “I expect this marriage to last for the rest of my life.” But I wasn’t going to get away so easily.

“Didn’t you expect the same thing for your other marriages?” he pressed.

“Well son, nobody goes into a marriage expecting it to fail.”

He looked thoughtful, “That makes sense.”

“But I guess what you are really asking is why do I think this one will be different. I believe that God chose this marriage not us. I believe that both of us followed His will when we decided to get married. Also, I believe there is a greater element of compatibility than before.”

“Well I really never saw you all quarrel so you could be right.”

And that was it. As I pondered the conversation, I felt the weight of past failures. Would it really be different? However, the feeling lasted no more than a moment. I have no illusions of my greatness as a husband or an easy road ahead but I am still very excited about the future. I am excited because I know Jesus is always with us in our marriage. Where we are weak, He is strong. With Jesus, our past does not dictate our future. He is THE reason for our hope.

I have rarely had the luxury of being able to tell my children that I did it all perfect so follow my example. My hope is that they will take the best from their parents and learn to avoid the worst. More than that, my ultimate hope is that my life will point them to Jesus, not to me. And I believe that that is a better heritage than a perfect track record!

Copyright Matik Nicholls, 2019. All rights reserved.
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A Culture Of Compliance

Welcome to part 3 of the kingdom culture series. Today I want to talk about how we lead people in the kingdom. Due to their span of influence, leaders have a great impact on the culture of the organizations or teams that they lead. Arguably nothing influences culture more than how we treat the people we lead.

Although it still exists in some organizations, I believe that the pitfalls of leading through intimidation, punishment and domination are well known and accepted in both the secular and church arenas. However, what is still prevalent and widely accepted today is a culture of compliance. Meaning that followers are required by leaders to comply with their instructions, no questions asked.

While compliance may be acceptable in the world value system, a culture of compliance is not kingdom culture. Many church people do not get this. Perhaps it is because in the Old Testament times it was all about compliance. The leadership system centered around a strict compliance with the religious laws and rituals enforced by the leader/king. It fostered an ultimate leader culture that was so dominant that the spiritual health of the entire community rose and fell on the character of the leader alone.

Then, over two thousand years ago Christ entered the scene and flipped the script. He modelled and taught a different kind of leadership. His leadership placed supreme value on winning the heart not just enforcing surface obedience. He said (Mat 5:27-28):

27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Jesus was the ultimate change agent for this new culture. Changing the compliance culture that had grown deep roots over hundreds of years of Jewish tradition was a monumental task. Jesus repeatedly confronted it head on as he butt heads with the religious leaders. He did not mince words. Check Him out in action(Mat 23:27-28):

27 “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness. 28 So you also outwardly appear righteous to others, but within you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness.

In the corporate world many leaders are focused on compliance with the company’s rules and the leader’s instructions. Insubordination is severely punished and not towing the line leads to victimization. When we consider that many churches function along the same lines we should be cut to the heart. The culture of the world has deeply infiltrated our churches. We have lost our saltiness.

Jesus walked in this earth humbly. He modeled the type of leader that God desires. His first response to sin was mercy and forgiveness. He did not seek to lord it over others and assert His authority and control as so many religious leaders do today. He loved us first and demonstrated it by dying for us while we were yet His enemies.

Remember when Jesus gave an experiential lesson to His disciples in servant leadership by washing their feet? He even washed Judas’ feet! The feet of the man whom He knew would cause Him so much pain and suffering; that man’s feet. In other words, Jesus loved and served the rogue church member who was out to assassinate His leadership. Think about that. Jesus’ objective is not to get us to serve Him by coercion or manipulation. He is committed to winning our love through loving sacrifice and service.

The church is rife with leaders who believe that their followers are best served by a culture of complete compliance to their leadership. Sin is shamed and punished. Those who obey unquestioningly and fawn over the leaders are favoured. Corporate world culture with a side order of hallelujah. I believe most church leaders are genuine but just do not understand how kingdom submission works. Submission is VOLUNTARY and in the church it is supposed to be RECIPROCAL. Forced submission is domination, period. Sometimes more subtle approaches like social pressure or withholding love or withholding opportunities are used but the cancer is the same. Corporate leaders use the same tactics.

The missed opportunity here is the opportunity to transform the heart through love. That is what Jesus is after. That is what the Father is after. That is what Jesus came to demonstrate. Gaining compliance without transformation of the heart is no gain at all in Christ’s books. The body of Christ is supposed to operate as a community of equals serving each other. We each have different roles and gifts but we are all directed by one head; Jesus Christ. We submit to one another. We honour one another. We love one another. There is no hierarchy of value in the body. The toe has the same value as the eye. Jesus says it this way (Mat 23:8-12):

8 But you are not to be called rabbi, for you have one teacher, and you are all brothers. 9 And call no man your father on earth, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. 10 Neither be called instructors, for you have one instructor, the Christ. 11 The greatest among you shall be your servant. 12 Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.

As kingdom leaders we have one job; to love all and to serve all. Our objective is not to gain people’s compliance but to win their hearts for Christ. That, is kingdom culture.

Copyright 2019, Matik Nicholls. All rights reserved.
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A Culture Of Happiness

Welcome to the second instalment of this series on kingdom culture. Today we address ‘the pursuit of happiness’. Everybody wants to be happy. Not only do we want to be happy but we believe that we deserve to be happy. Happiness… it means many things to many people. A dream job? Travelling the world? A husband? Children? All of the above? None of the above? The butterfly of happiness comes in a myriad of patterns and colours and shapes.

Look at the picture above. Linger on it for a while. This is one vision of happiness; the perfect family. The happy couple with their adorable children. Now juxtapose this vision against these words from Jesus (Mat 10:37-39):

37 Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38 And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

What is Jesus saying? Surely, we should love our father and mother and children? Of course! God is love! The message of love for all humanity is an immovable pillar of Christianity. But what Jesus is taking aim at here is a different kind of love; a love that worships the object of its desire. The love that says, “You are the centre of my world. You are my heart. I love you more than anything else!” Jesus is taking aim at what is your highest joy in life. Anything that you love more than Jesus is something you love too much.

Happiness is like a butterfly that rests only on the shoulder of Jesus. If you seek it, it will fly away from your grasping hands but if you forsake all and go after Jesus with all your heart, there you will find it resting peacefully. If you pursue happiness, even through your closest relationships, it will evade you.

Let’s go back to the photo. Think about how many advertisements incorporate this idea of happiness. The advertising agencies know what our deepest desires are and use them to sell their products. How many ads for milk, cereal, cleaning products, are set in the scene of the happy family? This is the apex of many of our hearts. Including Christian hearts. So many silent prayers and tears are said and shed for that perfect husband or wife that would make us happy? How many grandparents’ happiness rise and fall on the events of their grandchildren’s lives? How many are in anguish because they cannot have children? My hearts go out to these people not only because they are in pain but because the cure is not in the place they seek.

We need to stop selling a God who will make us happy with anything else but Himself. There must to be a place in our hearts reserved for God alone. A joy that is not moved by anything or anyone external. A spouse cannot make us happy but when God is at the centre of a marriage it is full of joy throughout the storms of life! Children or grandchildren cannot make us happy but a parent whose joy is in Christ is the most effective and happy parent of all! We are not pursuing God so that He would give us the things and relationships that would make us happy. We are pursuing Christ because He is our highest joy and most satisfying pleasure! The culture of the kingdom is not the pursuit of happiness but the pursuit of Christ!

Copyright Matik Nicholls, 2019. All rights reserved.